End Sabbatical

So apparently a couple of years went by when I wasn't looking.  I guess having another baby combined with inherent laziness makes for poor blog maintenance.  Ah, se la vie!  Well, it's time to reinvent myself once again.  All the greats have mastered reinvention... Madonna, Britney, my 4 year old.  Those are tough acts to follow.  I mean c'mon, I think I've seen at least 7 versions of my 4 year old in just the last 3 days.

To pick up our story where we left off, I no longer work as an Advertising Executive and, as already noted, have had another little one join the ranks.  I have jumped ship from sales to Education and am now working as a Student Advisor.  I also went back to school myself and am working on a business degree.  Cutie Poo has a little sister following her around all day long now that we affectionately refer to as Mater.  But hold on!  Two wasn't enough, so another little girl is cooking in the oven right now.  She will soon join the ranks and no doubt earn herself a nickname worthy of the greats before her.  As a side note, if anyone knows the recipe for making a boy, I'm all ears since I only seem to know one recipe and am doomed to swim in a sea of estrogen.

The Hawtness made a VERY tough life decision and no longer works as a firefighter/paramedic.  She is a stay-at-home mom who has mastered the art of cooking, baking, and never ceasing to amaze her husband at just how cool she is.  She misses her career immensely, and she has no idea how much I love and appreciate her for wanting to raise our beautiful family herself.

So there you have it.  I have officially made the blogging comeback.  And yes, I am attempting it now that I'm busier than ever before.  Apparently, having a super busy life is motivation to do more...?  Wish me luck!

In Memorium

There are moments in your life when you are reminded of what is most important to you, and you have the chance to evaluate where you are and what you think of yourself. Today was exactly that kind of day, and I learned a very painful, and valuable lesson.

A good friend of ours passed away last Sunday from complications associated with a disease called Lupus. She was only 30 years old. She leaves behind a very good man in her husband, and 2 beautiful young boys, ages 4 and 1. We attended her funeral today.

Laura was one of those special people that can be happy no matter what. She loved life. She was always smiling, and she was always trying to make others smile too. She was an extremely caring and compassionate person. Had I not known her, I may never have had the opportunity to meet and get to know the woman who would become my wife.

There is a long story behind this, which I won't go into in detail. It is difficult for me to share some of this, as I am not proud of some my actions. The short version is... Laura and I dated off and on for a year or so. I was not in a good place emotionally or spiritually at that time in my life. She wanted a real relationship but I held her at arm's length, taking advantage of her feelings knowing she wouldn't leave. I knew I could not give her what she wanted and deserved in a relationship. We finally broke up, but remained in contact as friends. She had a new roommate move in, who I became interested in. Although I knew Laura still had feelings for me, I began to date her new roommate and we eventually got married. Laura was very hurt in the process, but I didn't consider her feelings. I was the consummate jerk. Her friendship with my wife was also obviously affected by this, as they had been close previously.

Laura eventually went on to marry also, and have a family. We had both moved on and were very happy. After some time, she and my wife reconciled their friendship. Through her contact with my wife, she let it be known to me that there were no hard feelings on her part, and that she still considered me a friend and wanted only the best for me. She wanted a chance to talk, but I said no. She gave me a wide open door to step up and make things right, to apologize for what I put her through, to forgive, forget and move on. I didn't take it. She was left with the impression that I didn't want anything to do with a reconciliation.

As we sat through that funeral, I was haunted by my actions. I felt an overwhelming sense of regret. It may seem small or insignificant to you, I suppose. We had both moved on, right? We were both happily married and there was no need to pal around and hang out together. But that's not what she wanted. She just wanted me to know that bygones were bygones and we were good. This coming from the one who had been hurt. She went to her grave without knowing that I am truly sorry for the way I treated her, without hearing me say those words and offering a sincere apology. Even though she had already forgiven me, she deserved to hear it.

So the lesson I learned today is this... when we die, and we are thought of, spoken of, and remembered, the measuring stick of our life is truly nothing more than how we treated others. I NEVER want to attend another funeral and regret the way I treated that person. I NEVER want there to be "unfinished business", words left unspoken, deeds left undone. I NEVER want to experience that kind of regret again. Ever.

Laura, you taught me an invaluable lesson about our capacity to love and forgive. Thank you for your example, and for your life. I am grateful to have known you, and in honor of your memory I vow to share this lesson with all those willing to hear it.

Happy Birthday Babe

Just thought I'd share some reasons why I LOVE MY WIFE...

- She's a firefighter...

- ...Who's scared of heights

- Certain commercials make her cry

- Having to share chocolate with me also makes her cry

- She can hear a siren before most dogs do

- She has pretty handwriting

- Sometimes she cracks herself up so much with her own joke that she cries laughing

- She will LITERALLY run out of a room with a spider in it

- She wears cute little Christmas pajamas around the house all year long

- She starts listening to Christmas music in September

- She makes the best version of my mom's Christmas fudge that I've ever had

- She thinks everyday should be Christmas

- She checks her favorite blogs religiously (first thing in the morning and last thing before going to bed)

- I farted on our first date... in the Jeep... with all the windows up... and she stuck around

- She can't sit on the couch to watch TV without being curled up under a blanket

- She loves crossword puzzles

- Her mouth turns up in this cute little, almost crooked, half-smile when she's trying to keep from laughing at one of my dumb jokes... or when she's up to no good

- Her legs are as white as mine

- Nap time is her favorite part of the day, with milk & cookies a close second

- She doesn't like to do the grocery shopping alone

- She makes killer banana bread

- If I haven't had a chance to get to the ice cream before her, she's sweet enough to save me a spoonful, sometimes two

- She takes the time to play with my daughter, read books, and teach her to count while I'm at work

- She can't play a card game without tidying up the deck on the table during the game

- She prefers an even number of comments on her blog posts, and doesn't know why

- She gets the hiccups while brushing her teeth

- She likes to hold my hand in the car while we're driving

- She's patriotic

- She loves the outdoors

- She can shoot a gun

- Her eyes twinkle at the thought of watching the next episode of The Hills

- She has the perfect nails for scratching my back

- She likes to put her "Holy *!#@ those are cold!!" feet on mine in bed at night, but won't let me put mine on hers when they're cold

- She knows north, east, south, & west (sounds basic, but I've dated girls who didn't)

- She's a wonderful mother to my little girl

Bottom line; she's the smartest, most beautiful, caring, most patient, kindest, funniest, strongest and most loving woman I know. She is, just like the song playing says, EVERYTHING to me. I would be utterly and completely lost without her. She is beautiful inside and out. And I love her with my whole being.

And one day, I'm going to take her to a beautiful beach for her birthday, just like the one in the background. But until then Babe, this picture will have to do. I am so glad you didn't give up on me. I feel so lucky to have you, and am amazed everyday that you're willing to put up with me, and sacrifice so much. I LOVE YOU!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

See my bum?

Says my 2 year old to me tonight as we're eating dinner. "Tell daddy where we went today" says mama. After some thought, "See my bum? I sit in big fire truck!"

Sometimes I wish we could all just speak in "2 year old". So simple, so creative, so funny. And then, I got to thinking... "See my bum?" was not so much a question but rather a declaration. My bum is important. Anything it does or is associated with is important. See my bum? It sat on a fire truck today. That fire truck is now important. In fact, daddy, I'll have you know that anything my bum touches is catapulted to a level of prestige and honor never-before-known to that object.

See this high chair? It has obtained rock-star status because of my bum! See that car seat? It's bound for the hall of fame because of my bum. See that swingset? It will fetch over $1 million on E-bay because my bum touched it.

I can only hope and pray that she never loses that level of confidence in herself. Because one day, the world will show her its ugly side... put her down, mock her, tease her, criticize her, and otherwise make her feel worthless. And in those moments, I hope she remembers back to when she was 2. I hope she stands up to the world and says, "See my bum? It sat in a cold hard chair for hours on end to pull a 4.0 GPA. See my bum? It helped me endure falls and bruises to win state. See my bum? It got me through super intense study sessions at a prestigious university to graduate with honors. See my bum? It sat on airplanes and buses that took me places all over the world that I wanted to see."

"Yes indeed. See my bum? It was there to catch my fall the day the love of my life proposed to me. It sat in that rocking chair in the front room of our tiny little home for countless hours as I nursed newborn children I had brought into this world. It sat in that chair at the kitchen table for years, helping those kids with homework, putting puzzles together with them, teaching them invaluable principles to help guide them in their lives. It sat next to crying friends and family members who suffered heartache, stress, and loss in their lives. It helped me be a comfort and a support to them, and forget myself. It helped me serve others. What has your bum done?"

That's right cutie poo... "See my bum?" Say it loud, say it confidently. Show the world what you're made of. And that anything associated with your bum IS important, because you're important. You will do great things in this life. You and your cute little bum...

Stephenie Meyer

... and I have something in common; Our taste for music. She is a big fan of Muse and Linkin Park. What a co-inky-dink!! So am I.

So in honor of 2 of my favorite bands, I put together this little playlist to the right that you hear when you pull up my blog. (Yes it's been there for over a month, I know. I had originally planned to post this back then and have it all coincide with the release of her new book. But, I'm lazy. There were just too many re-runs of Myth Busters and Dirty Jobs to get through). And as you've already seen, I changed my background. There is some duality of purpose to that. It was supposed to be a kind of tribute to my wife walking away from full-time firefighting. As well as to provide something a little more dark and edgy, to go along with the music. But I'm thinking I might be doing a remodel very soon.

Anyway, back to Stephenie Meyer... although I'm probably not a fan at the level she seems to be, I'm happy to say that I have something in common with a multi-millionaire. Makes me feel good, especially because you always here the cliche, "If you want to be successful, emulate successful people". That's gotta include their taste in music, right? Seems like a pretty safe place to start. I mean, otherwise you have to actually get out there and come up with some brilliant idea and actually WORK and stuff. Who wants to do that? I'll just stick with the music for now and see what happens.

I have to admit I've never read one of her books. But I don't need to read them. I know them inside and out, through osmosis. My wife has read the first 3 books in the series 4 times (no that's not a typo, 4 times!). She has literally absorbed them and they are now a part of her. She has vampires coursing through her veins. So I just have to cuddle next to my wife on the couch or in bed and presto! I have visions of vampires running through the trees, and Bella and Edward's beautiful romance unfolds before me. It's really much easier than all that reading.

Don't get me wrong though, I like to think of myself as well-read and someone who enjoys the classics. I even have one or two classics on my bookshelf, like "The Gas We Pass" (thanks Denise!), and the entire 3 volume collection of "Calvin & Hobbes". In my opinion, no one more eloquently puts life in perspective than Calvin. He's truly a man after my own heart. But I digress...

So here's to Muse... and to Linkin Park. Play on, boys. I'm listening...

Sentimental Hanky

So we're getting ready to start potty-training my little girl. She's 2, and has shown an increasing interest in going potty. She likes to take off her own diaper, and go sit on her little potty we bought her. Usually she'll just sit there and chatter away like a squirrel defending its nuts. But yesterday, much to our surprise, a 2 year old version of Mr. Hanky emerged in the little bowl and there was much excitement and celebration and even a standing ovation. "Dada, I caca! I caca!" (I think at that very moment there was a cartoon entourage from Monty Python that passed through the bathroom exclaiming something about much rejoicing in the land, waving a flag and saying "Yeah" not-so-enthusiastically).

In fact, it was such a special moment, that when I transferred Jr. Mr. Hanky from her potty to the toilet and flushed it, she sadly said "Bye, caca, bye" and waved as it swirled it's way down and disappeared to the land of has-been Hankies. Then she looked at me and said "Where'd do?" which means, where'd it go? "Bye, caca, bye" (waving...)

- Howcome an incident involving poo can be so adorable from a 2 year old, but when it's your own... fuggettaboutit!! Seriously, when was the last time you waved your own poo down the toilet, sad to see it go, like parting from an old friend?

An Inconvenient Something

First it was Al Gore bringing us "An Inconvenient Truth". Now Glenn Beck is bringing us "An Inconvenient Book". Well if these guys can make a fortune off of their inconveniences, why can't I?

Introducing, "An Inconvenient Something" - My list of inconveniences. (It should take me no time at all to come up with enough inconveniences to fill a book.)

- I find it inconvenient that my upper cupboards between the sink and the stove don't open in a logical direction. They open in the opposite direction you expect them to. Very inconvenient.

- It's inconvenient that my daughter always wakes up from her nap at just about the time I've finished getting everything done I needed to do while she was asleep, and my head has just hit the pillow for my own quick snooze. Very inconvenient.

- My car only has one speed on the intermittent wiper setting. Inconvenient. And it doesn't have keyless entry. Extremely inconvenient. I actually have to stick the key in the door and unlock it manually. I know, it's crazy huh? My wife's car AND my old beater Jeep both have keyless entry. What if some crazy psycho came after me in a parking lot? I'd have to sue Honda for not being able to get into my car quick enough to speed away from danger.

- It's very inconvenient to drink a Red Bull, then have your manager call a staff meeting that lasts an hour. And she can't figure out why you're not paying close attention and you get yelled at for not responding. The sprint down the hallway at the end of the meeting to the bathroom is the most inconvenient of all... it's too long.

- The lightswitches in our bedroom and bathroom are inconvenient. They're behind the doors. Inconvenient enough to warrant beating the architect who drew them there.

- Inconvenient is going all the way downstairs to the storage room only to get distracted by something in the room that you haven't seen in ages, and forgetting what you went into that room for in the first place. "So THAT'S where she hid that sweater I bought her for Christmas!"

- It's inconvenient that my sabre-toothed-crotch-crickets always seem to be most active as I crawl into bed at night, necessitating serious itching counter measures, and even more inconvenient that after a few minutes of this my wife has to ask, "Um, what are you doing?"

- A horrible dating inconvenience is being nervous and having a propensity for tummy rumbling, explosive gas. If you're lucky enough for her NOT to hear it as you walk around the back of the car, you'd better come up with something creative to stay out there long enough for her NOT to smell it when you get in. A related, and more serious, inconvenience is having your best friend blurt out to her the following Monday at school that when you got back to the car after dropping her off, you let it all out at him. "Ew! Is that what you guys do after you drop us off?" What did you expect? High fives for most awkward date in history? Puh-leeeaaaase. (Now you ladies know the truth about why we're not good listeners. Our concentration is elsewhere)

- It's SOOOO inconvenient to have a cop pull your wife over and cite her for no mudflaps on your Jeep, which she never drives and just happened to take to the store out of convenience of parking arrangement that day. It's even more inconvenient when a year-and-a-half later that same cop pulls over that same wife in that same Jeep for that same reason! Like he didn't have anything better to do.

More Inconvenient Somethings in future posts. Right now, I have to go feed my 2 year old and then put her in the bathtub. How inconvenient of her to interrupt my blogging brilliance.